Friday, 4 February 2011

Stupid Questions With Smart Answers

I looked back on the email sent by my friends in few years ago.
Then I found an interesting email, I decided to share it here.

I hope you like it.

1)
Girlfriend : "...And are you sure you love me and no one else ?"
Boyfriend : "Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday".

2)
Teacher : "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?"
Pupil : "The moon".
Teacher : "Why?"
Pupil : "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it".

3)
Teacher : "What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?"
Pupil : "A teacher".

4)
Waiter : "Would you like your coffee black?"
Customer : "What other colors do you have?"

5)
My father is so old that when he was in school, history was called current affairs.

6)
Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !"
Sam : "It's a family tradition".
Teacher : "What do you mean?"
Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher".
Teacher : "What about your mother?"
Sam : "She's a woman".

7)
Tom : "How should I convey the news to my father that I've failed?"
David: "You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year's performance repeated".

8)
Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?"
Student : "Brotherly love".

9)
Teacher : "Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?"
Sam : "No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook".

10)
Patient : "What are the chances of my recovering doctor?"
Doctor : "One hundred percent. Medical records show that nine out of ten people die of the disease you have. Yours is the tenth case I've treated. The others all died".

11)
Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day and at the same time."

12)
Teacher : " George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it.
Now do you know why his father didn't punish him ?"
One Student: " Because George still had the axe in is hand."

13)
BOY : May I hold your hand?
GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.

14)
GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!
BOY : You love me...

15)
GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring??
BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??

16)
GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest.
BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple

17)
GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.
BOY : Don't you ever want to improve??

18)
BOY : I love you and I could die for you!
GIRL : How soon??

19)
BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!
GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there??
WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out of the other.
HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and comes out of the mouth.

20)
MARY : John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly.What do u think,
Peter?
PETER : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly.

7 comments:

  1. haha, i love these jokes :)

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  2. Cool one! Cheer up my new year mood! wakakaka

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  3. sometimes a stupid question cheer us up :)

    happy chinese new year to you!

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  4. I loves Jokes, thanks for the post !! =D

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  5. Haha. Ya, those jokes really cheer a lot of people.

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